Silpheed/Budweiser

Game: Silpheed, Game Arts, 1993, Sega CD
Beer: Budweiser, 12 fl.oz., 5% abv
# of beers consumed during play: 4
Level Reached: 5th level
Level of Intoxication: Woozy

Game
I'm quite the fan of shoot-em-up games, more commonly referred to as Shmups. I particularly like "bullet hell" shooters, but I can sit down with just about anything that pits me against thousands of identical foes and their unending quest to see me disintegrated in their phalanx of glowing projectiles. Silpheed, which has recently enjoyed a pseudo-sequel on the Xbox 360, was one of my favorite games back when the Sega CD was the mighty poo. As a "lucky" owner of this combination of systems, I would seize every opportunity to show this game off to any of my friends who would pay even a moment's notice. This one of the genuine gems of the Sega CD system, and a worthy play even to this day.

Gameplay
Silpheed is a single player romp through the galaxy, fighting off hordes of fast-moving enemy ships and their rather uninspiring bosses. At the outset of the game, the player is equipped with twin cannons. In later levels this can be upgraded with spread fire, phalanx guns, and other accoutrements of destruction. The enemies in this game consist of coordinated waves, many following patterns while others move somewhat randomly as they vector towards your ship. The baddies move blindingly fast, and they shoot projectiles that at times move even faster, making this one of the rarified "twitch" games. In later levels, the twitch factor ramps up exponentially, until you find yourself wishing you had a speedball to mainline just to keep up with the action.

Many of the enemy ships will quite happily kamikaze towards you, moving erratically enough to cause you to second-guess your evasive maneuvers. Luckily, this game departs from shooter convention in that a single hit will not obliterate you, but only shave a healthy chunk off your shield meter. The trade-off to this is the fact that you only have one life, and losing all your shield and subsequently dying means game over. Interestingly enough, even when your shield is depleted, another hit will not automatically kill you. In a stroke of game design genius, the developers included a mechanic whereupon absorbing damage beyond the your ship's shield will result in systems failing, including engines and weapons. The resultant partial loss of control or the elimination of one of your weapons systems creates a palpable feeling of tension, as you desperately attempt to survive through the waves of enemy attacks with a crippled ship. Repair pickups are available at pre-designated points in the game, and if you've been unlucky enough to have eaten an unscheduled laser sandwich, you'll find yourself clamoring for these much needed power-ups as you dodge the relentless onslaught of the enemy.

Thanks to some creativity on the part of the game developers, the FMV backgrounds are not just for show. In many stages, elements of the background are able to intersect with your ship, "intersect" in this context meaning blow to smithereens. Having to dodge background set pieces such as asteroids and other dangers added another layer of difficulty to this game and set it another level apart from its contemporaries of the day. Showing particular inspiration in this regard is the fourth level, a honeycomb-like maze of structures which raise, lower, and separate in interesting and unpredictable ways, forcing the player to fly and shoot with deep precision lest they become a stain on one of the laser emitting pylons.
In between levels, as you progress, a weapon selection screen will offer more choices to augment your main weapon, as well as an "option" weapon, which is nice to have in a pinch at times. With the right outfit of weapon types, you'll find your ship to be quite formidable, even against the asshole legions of kamikaze ships which require entirely too many hits to kill.

The game is woefully short, with some levels seeming to be over before they've ever begun, and the game as a whole short enough to sit through in the time it takes to cook some mac 'n cheese. The replay value is also hurt significantly by the fact the levels never change, owing to the FMV. But in my opinion, for a quick, nasty twitch gaming fix, this classic title simply cannot be beat.

Graphics/Sound
Well, anyone who was conscious during the mid 90's knows the plight the first CD-based game systems brought to the world of videogames...Full Motion Video. FMV was the videogame equivalent of the black plague, it was terrible, irreversibly damaging, and it was everywhere. FMV was touted as the technology that would take games into the 21st century and beyond by anyone who had never played a videogame in his or her life. Fortunately, the savvy gamers of the day knew what the score was, and voted with their wallets, and the vote of the day (after everyone else realized how terrible Night Trap was) was that FMV sucked and had to go. Interestingly enough, some games did well with the addition of FMV, and one of those games just happened to be Silpheed. While much of the FMV is grainy and pixelated, the presentation still conveys an above-satisfactory sensation of fighting in a large-scale space war, complete with huge lasers ripping capital ships apart.
The polygons were pretty revolutionary for consoles at the time, and the myriad effects, while suffering quite a lot in this modern post-shader-age of graphics capabilities, were pretty cool when you were huddled with some friends around this shiny new CD technology. Despite all my misgivings, all I have to say in the graphics defense is level 5. I know it's pre-rendered and a very simple effect, but really...I felt like I was going to go plaid. That's gotta count for something.

The sound is a mixed bag, but I have to give it an overall thumbs up seeing as how it's on the Sega CD. Most of the music is dorky and spacy in a way that one would associate William Shatner's underwear with spacy. Sure it'll get you there if you concentrate real hard, but surely there are better ways. Some of the themes are well done and work to immerse the player in the action, but it seemed as though most of the good ones were saved for the very last levels. The music as a whole seemed a bit dinky, but it gets the job done. As for the sounds, they were pretty good, they mostly integrated well with the game, and the voice samples and narration tracks were not only clear and understandable, but were pretty damn well acted to boot. The female narrator for the story segments seemed to hit a sweet-spot in particular in regards to delivery, making the overly blunt plot synopses seem natural and immersive. During the course of the levels, voice samples will crop up, lending some helpful advice to players, such as a suggested direction to veer out of an asteroid's path or that a boss ship is approaching. Not bad.
Story
The story isn't half-bad, a bunch of malevolent automatons appear and begin hacking our global space super computer. We of course take this as an offense, and mobilize our defense forces in an effort to prevent said space hackers from reaching our planet. Fortunately, we have at our disposal an armada of tactical space fighters and even more fortunately, you are the highly trained pilot of one of these "SA-77 Silpheed" fighters. You and your conspicuously absent wingmen will trek across space not only in search of the source of this mounting evil, but also to repel the borders of your soft, chewy, vulnerable earth.

As a momentary aside, and also to pad out the "story" segment of this review, one wonders why this planet is so universally desirable to the entire rest of the cosmos. Forgetting for a moment that it makes a good story since we're somewhat of reliant on this planet for our continued survival, it still gives one pause...what would an advanced alien race want with our puny, polluted planet? It's not like there isn't a, y'know...infinite number of other planets in the universe, and unless all the alien stories written so far just coincidentally feature planet-collecting ETs who are devout completists, that apparently pegs Earth as the only resource-rich rock in the entire dimensional fold. While that may be true if the resources in question are stupidity and salt water, I am otherwise disinclined to accept that with bazillions of other exploitable interstellar bodies out there, we keep getting shafted in the hostile invasion department.

Beer
I happened across a sixpack of cans of Budweiser at my local piggly-wiggly, and I was unable to pass up the opportunity. The feeling of snapping a can off the dolphin muzzle, cracking it open, and savoring that first long drink was a sensation that will doubtless stick with me for all time. The motions involved were so ageless, steeped in another time and generation, that partaking in it felt nearly ritualistic. Knowing that thanks to tree hugging hippies and expansive corporate accountability legislation, the sixpack of cans is quickly going the way of the dodo made the experience all the more savory.

The beer itself isn't bad, although the term "King of Beers" seems to indicate its sovereignty is based more on its ubiquity than its quality. The beer is by no means poor, and its accessibility and widely acceptable taste have made it popular with many casual drinkers including fraternities, NASCAR fans, welfare recipients, and deadbeat dads. The taste is crisp and there is a fair amount of bite, elevating this (in my opinion) over its primary competitor, Coors. Budweiser does have a characteristic sweetness to it, particularly in the aftertaste which, while not exactly off-putting, may not appeal to certain people. Many beer snobs like to use this beer as their primary figurehead when it comes to slandering the American beer industry. And while this may not have the complexity of an average microbrew, it still manages to pull off the "beer" thing pretty well.

The smell is rather dry and grainy, which doesn't really seem to match the taste, and flattens out the entire experience by a bit. Still, average is average, and average is a damn sight better than terrible so you won't see me working this beverage over too badly. With an average smell and a slightly above average taste, the barly-pop in question certainly earns its middle-of-the-road popularity. If McDonald's served beer, this would be what they had on tap. Interpret that as you like.

The one thing that I found interesting about this beer was the fact the first few sips were explosive in carbonation, after which once my mouth became acclimated to the beer, the explosive bubblies seemed to calm down and started to lend themselves to a more refreshing prickly type of feel. Before long, as I worked my way through the sixer, I scarcely even noticed the fizz, and I was happily chugging through cans with impunity. This of course got me intoxicated quicker, and I found that the five percent alcohol content came on nice and steady, ramping up my inebriation comfortably. The feeling was of a pronounced but still coordinated whirliness, and there didn't seem to be any indications of an overly painful morning after. Cheese quesadillas went fantastic with this beer, as I imagined most food would.

The Matchup
Both of these properties are solid contenders, they aren't blockbusters, but they aren't anywhere near absolute shite either. They both occupy an above average stance, allowing one to partake of their wares without having to invest too much of oneself in the process. While Silpheed may have aged considerably since its release, it still possesses sharp fundamentals and a carefully balanced difficulty curve. Budweiser also possesses a solid foundation which has made it quite popular, while lacking any truly distinctive qualities that would allow it to rise head and shoulders above the rest of the field. One aspect that both these things have in common is that if you go in knowing what to expect, you can still have a great time with both of them, particularly in tandem.

Cheers/Game on.